POLL: How do you avoid / want to be avoided

[Vulgar Boy]

I generally go into situations determined to dislike everyone so that if they dislike me then I can take the small victory of having gotten there first. As a result I rarely find myself in a position of wanting to avoid people. Like, wanting to avoid them for behavioral reasons, at least. The few times it has come up I’ve fallen squarely into avoid as long as possible, because it feels like on a MUSH there is always this grim readiness for spectacular drama, and the most polite version of “Can we do this some other way? I’d rather not RP with you” can spiral out of control. Of course avoidance and delaying eventually fail, but you can always hope that the MUSH closes or the universe succumbs to entropy before you have to deal with it.

The best way to find someone is avoiding you is to hear it from a friend who is more your friend then their friend, so they will make fun of them with you.

[helvetica]

Sometimes, when you dont fuck with somebody, it can feel like they take up a lottttt of space. When a game is small, that can be a challenge, at least for me personally. I’ve definitely passed on games for that reason. I’ve also said fuck it, hit page/block discord/block, and put up my feet.

I can’t imagine someone trying to rp after instituting a no contact. That’s… manipulative as hell.

[Dreampipe]

There’s been moments where, in being direct to someone about playing with them, I’ve ended up being very rude in the process. It’s difficult for me at times to separate the character from the human, and it can feel overly personal. I like to think I’ve improved on that since I started playing on a big game, but I do look back at my past behavior and just go “eugh”

I still think a direct approach is good, but taking a diplomatic tone to it is even more important, imo. Just to separate the line and let them know that, whatever reason you have, it’s not personal. The vibe is just off, lukewarm, or nonexistent.

Unless it is personal. And then idk, german suplex them or something.

[Artemis]

I don’t seek them, and in turn, I assume they don’t seek me. If they’re extremely boring/grating to me, I’ll probably dip from a scene when they join. Tbh this is rare, though, it’s pretty easy for me to find something to like about everybody, and I’ll rp with anyone at least once. The thing that really annoys me is when a person will continuously page/mail me with greetings or requests, meanwhile I’m either ghosting or replying super sparsely. If I pick up on this with someone else, I stop trying to contact them. So I guess what I’m tryna say is fuck direct confrontation, JUST GHOST ME.
Should probably add that ‘just ghost me’ isn’t a thing that applies to established connections. That’s a whole other deal.

[Duke Whisky]

RP anyways, both counts.

Sorry to everyone that I have made sit there and suffer those few hours with me. I’d ask for forgiveness, but it is what I want.

[hellfrog]

@Whisky

[lucidmaus]

I think it depends on the reasons for the avoidance, so that complicates things.

Generally, I’ll RP with anyone, though, unless they make it exquisitely clear they don’t want to RP with me. Ghosting is fine (unless it’s someone I know and like and have a rapport with OOC; then I’d prefer a more direct conversation.) If they’re exceptionally boring, that just means scenes will be shorter.

For people where there’s a personal issue for whatever reason, that’s easier: just avoid. Do not acknowledge in RP, do not RP with them, do not talk about their characters (unless it’d be weird not to, but I’m not about to go bringing up that person’s alts in RP of my own volition and will let the other player(s) know that’s a topic I’m not comfortable with), etc.

[SpaceKhomeini]

@helvetica said in POLL: How do you avoid / want to be avoided:

Sometimes, when you dont fuck with somebody, it can feel like they take up a lottttt of space.

Funny enough, it seems like the people I try to avoid are all people who take up a shitton of space in the first place.

[farfalla]

@lucidmaus said in POLL: How do you avoid / want to be avoided:

do not talk about their characters

This is such a good point. I also don’t bring up their characters, but there are definitely times where someone is avoiding/no-contact with a player and yet will bring up their character. Why?! Is this a weird powerplay because you know I won’t respond? Pls stop. We do not exist to each other.

[Apos]

@lucidmaus said in POLL: How do you avoid / want to be avoided:

For people where there’s a personal issue for whatever reason, that’s easier: just avoid. Do not acknowledge in RP, do not RP with them, do not talk about their characters (unless it’d be weird not to, but I’m not about to go bringing up that person’s alts in RP of my own volition and will let the other player(s) know that’s a topic I’m not comfortable with), etc.

But if I do that how will I ever get the last word in and try to passive aggressively convince everyone I was right and they were wrong about something I’m still mad about

[Roz]

@farfalla said in POLL: How do you avoid / want to be avoided:

Is this a weird powerplay because you know I won’t respond?

yes.

[SpaceKhomeini]

@farfalla

Yeah, like getting certain types of IC mentions from people who’ve had basically zero contact with your character is a thing that provokes some headscratching on my part.

I accept these things can be situational and – well, clearly this creature is interesting enough to gab about in a scene but not interesting enough to say hello to/pie in the face IC?

I get it if the character in question is like Lord Fartgoblin III and you live in the fiefdom of House Fartgoblin or have been beefing with them, or have taken the time to note established ties with them, but again, that’s situational.

I don’t automatically assume bad intentions, this is just something I don’t do and feels weird.

[Pax]

@SpaceKhomeini If it’s someone I’ve actually had no contact with and the tone is sharp, I take it as flirting for PVP so… if you open that door, don’t let me hear any shit when I walk through it.