Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent

[Pavel]

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

I’m wondering if I just interpreted that statement incorrectly.

Mayhaps your brain was being inattentive.

Honestly, though, it does sound like there was jumbling from both sides. Next time you can, ask for clarification and try to get something in writing so you can take it with you and process it in your own time.

But from what you’ve said it does sound like your psychiatrist was diagnosing you, at least tentatively, with ADHD, Inattentive presentation.

[Testament]

@Pavel If nothing else, it proves that I have never liked tele-health meetings because I feel like a lot is missed.

I have a follow up in about a week to ask how I’m reacting to the medication. I suppose I could always change that to an in person meeting.

Suppose in my head it’s not a diagnosis to me until I’m literally told “You have X”. Which I guess is why I was slightly confused by being given the prescription to begin with.

I didn’t even know what atomoxetine did until I googled it. And became more confused when I read that it was used to treat ADHD. And in my head I’m wondering why I was given it.

[Pavel]

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

Suppose in my head it’s not a diagnosis to me until I’m literally told “You have X”. Which I guess is why I was slightly confused by being given the prescription to begin with.

When it comes to mental health diagnoses, there’s a lot more ruling out than making definite statements. Various conditions have overlapping diagnostic criteria and symptoms, so some practitioners will treat based on a preliminary diagnosis while also continuing to seek further information before making a formal/official diagnosis.

I wasn’t officially diagnosed with bipolar disorder until around a year and a half of being actively treated for it, for instance.

[Testament]

@Pavel said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

Suppose in my head it’s not a diagnosis to me until I’m literally told “You have X”. Which I guess is why I was slightly confused by being given the prescription to begin with.

When it comes to mental health diagnoses, there’s a lot more ruling out than making definite statements. Various conditions have overlapping diagnostic criteria and symptoms, so some practitioners will treat based on a preliminary diagnosis while also continuing to seek further information before making a formal/official diagnosis.

I wasn’t officially diagnosed with bipolar disorder until around a year and a half of being actively treated for it, for instance.

Alright, that makes more sense in that context. In this light, I suppose I have more questions I need to ask.

I haven’t wanted to say that I was left confused by that last conversation, because I don’t like questioning professionals who genuinely seem to want to help. That or I’m gullible in this respect. As in, why seem to unwilling to say ADHD, but is more willing to discuss Predominantly Inattentive? The idea of one being received more as a stigma and other isn’t? That’s just a guess on my part.

But I’ve also never really had a psychiatrist before until this last November, so I have nothing to base the experience on.

[Pavel]

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

I haven’t wanted to say that I was left confused by that last conversation, because I don’t like questioning professionals who genuinely seem to want to help.

I’m sure she does want to help, and if she does then she’d be more than happy to explain things to ease your confusion. That’s part of helping too. She is providing a service to you, for which you (or an insurance company, etc.) are paying. Part of that service is that you also have a clear understanding of what’s going on. Asking for clarity is an expected part of the exchange.

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

As in, why seem to unwilling to say ADHD, but is more willing to discuss Predominantly Inattentive?

I mean, that just doesn’t make sense. “Predominantly Inattentive” isn’t a thing without the ADHD bit. I think there’s some confusion there, from one or both of you. It seems very much like she’s avoiding making a final diagnosis so she’s avoiding terms that make it seem like she’s diagnosing… but yes, go seek more clarity.

[Testament]

@Pavel said in [Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent]

I mean, that just doesn’t make sense. “Predominantly Inattentive” isn’t a thing without the ADHD bit. I think there’s some confusion there, from one or both of you. It seems very much like she’s avoiding making a final diagnosis so she’s avoiding terms that make it seem like she’s diagnosing… but yes, go seek more clarity.

Honestly, it’s probably me. I’m either misremembering or just confused about something. I just remember nodding my head a lot, because I was thinking about what it all means for me. I don’t think it’s her. But again, I didn’t ask for clarification.

But I would agree that she’s avoiding making a diagnosis, which I think is where a lot of this stems form. I was pinning a lot of my hopes on finally being given answers and…well. I didn’t get that answer, but left with more questions. Which I then proceeded to internalize because that’s generally my default setting is to internalize.

[Pavel]

@Testament Unfortunately, confusion and not getting expected answers is part and parcel of dealing with mental health stuff. Without knowing the full layout of your particular situation I obviously can’t judge, but I’d definitely require a bunch of information gathering over a few sessions before I felt comfortable saying that someone 99.9999% has X, Y, or Z.

[Pavel]

Also important to note: It’s not your fault that you’re confused. It’s fucking confusing for all of us (client/patient and practitioner alike) and I’ve got the DSM-V open on my desk right now. The brain’s weird, and when it goes wrong (by certain definitions…) it gets weirder.

If you weren’t confused, it’d just mean you weren’t really paying attention.

[Rinel]

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

I don’t know if ADHD falls into some kind of spectrum or not.

It is part of an extremely broad category of executive dysfunction. I don’t want to say spectrum in particular, because that sort of indicates that things like ADHD are on one side and things like OCD on the other. Some people have both.

Ask me how I know.

Though our understanding of psychiatry is not really advanced enough for us to do much more than diagnose people based on syndromes–we can’t point exactly to where something is going on in the brain and say “ah, well, that’s why your executive function is wonky.”

[Faraday]

@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

I don’t know if ADHD falls into some kind of spectrum or not. She was willing to say that there was something to read into it. Or at least enough to prescribe me medication for it?

ADHD is not a “spectrum” per se, but it does have three distinct subtypes with subtly different presentations. How to ADHD has a good explainer on the differences (also a great channel overall for understanding ADHD and how to work with it). I’m not suggesting you try to diagnose yourself from it, but learning more about it may help give you vocabulary to understand what your provider is saying and ask the right questions.

[junipersky]

I feel bad that I’m super grateful little foster child is in school today while I’m home on my spring break. (She is in a different district than I teach in.) But I am grateful. I needed a solid rest from the constant stimulation. I hope it helps me be better for her.

[mietze]

@junipersky it’s important to have those breaks! i did therapeutic emergency placements/respite for awhile (and i’m sure the number of respite folks has not increased since the time that i did!) and just having a break can really be helpful, so i’m glad you have some time without having to tap in to that!

[Pavel]

@junipersky said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

I feel bad that I’m super grateful little foster child is in school today while I’m home on my spring break.

All parents feel this. Most parents feel guilty about feeling this. But it’s absolutely normal. Parenting is work - rewarding, no doubt, but work nonetheless. And we all need breaks from work.

[ten]

insurance approved TMS therapy. here goes nuthin.’

[Tributary]

I am so exhausted I want to cry.

My spouse has insomnia regularly. And since paramedics shattered his shoulder 10 months ago, he is in constant sporadic pain. It is so so hard to sleep next to someone who keeps twitching and murmuring, especially when you know they’re taking comfort from your presence.

But I woke up an hour before my alarm and I have a headache already from the stress and I have to go to work and I’m so tired from his restlessness. I want a hug.

[Deviant]

@Tributary

As someone who also sleeps next to someone with chronic insomnia, I feel for you. It’s so exhausting.

[SockMonkey]

County offices and everything takes so damn long on their end, but when they need something and you don’t jump through every hoop you are called uncooperative. Even when it’s hoops they have only told you about and not set up yet. Meanwhile watching your child wait on important help they need because of it.

Words. Cannot. Express. My. Rage.

[junipersky]

You don’t have a fever nor are you throwing up.
Sorry sweetheart, OFF TO SCHOOL.

[RightMeow]

I know this is just a meh sort of thing and it effects everyone, but still. I’m tired. All the time. Like mentally and emotionally tired. I am really good at masking (which I suppose also makes me mentally and emotionally tired), but dang.

I don’t know if this is older getting to me. I remember those people sitting around the table talking about being tired. Now I’m those people. Or if it’s depression. Or just you know how it is.

It’s not ending my life, but it is killing my motivation to do anything.

That’s it. I’m just tired.

[Pavel]

@RightMeow said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

That’s it. I’m just tired.

The biggest thing impacting people, both (diagnosed) mentally ill and not, who see me professionally (am therapist, much counselling, wow) is just…

The world be the way it is, and it’s shit for a lot of us. You’re definitely not alone in feeling the way you do. I’ve got all these tools and all this training, and it still just sucks.