Royal Paynes

RedJellyBean

@Livia That was who I was thinking of. I knew someone would know the name.

L. B. Heuschkel

Ah, Shamash, yes. We had that experience briefly as well. Didn’t ban him – he got into a fight with another player and they both left.

Jenn

@Tez

As someone with a bad habit for giving people a lot more trust and leeway than is safe due to a defaulting of trying to assume the best intentions in people even when internet people specifically have patterns of NOT having best intentions…

How much labor and trouble would it be to move the topic of gaslighting, IC/OOC creeping from mind-reading/thought manipulation, etc to a rough and rowdy thread dedicated just to that?

I feel like there is a lot of really important discourse and behavioral patterns to unpack here in regards to over-all MUSHing community safety, but dropping back into that topic regularly while thinking it’s going to be an overall review of CoG/CoD mechanics/setting/lore is starting to hit me from unexpected directions when it turns out to be posts instead about manipulative patterns of players unrelated to the actual game and its reviews. Would that be a fork that could be moved without too much trouble/work involved?

Roz

I feel like the majority of the conversation has been about the player who was on the game, which is pretty relevant to the game.

Rough and Rowdy isn’t for sensitive topics, it’s for a rougher approach to topics. Even if something did get moved, I don’t think I’d want anything about manipulative behavior to be moved to that particular forum as a matter of course just based on the subject matter.

Jenn

@Roz said in City of Glass - Discussion:

Rough and Rowdy isn’t for sensitive topics, it’s for a rougher approach to topics.

It is a sensitive topic. A change of venue isn’t because people are saying mean things. But some of us who have experienced these kinds of manipulations enough to have significant trauma that can be incredibly triggering when you don’t know if you’re about to read about gas-lighting as opposed to Demons/Changeling/CoD theme things is triggering af - at least to me.

I’m finding myself having to weigh the risks of missing out about theme and lore info that as a new player to the setting is invaluable or instead risking PTSD reactions and trauma responses to something that is not at all CoG specific, even if this particular instance of it happened on this specific game.

And I’m well aware that my trauma responses and emotional reactions are mine and mine alone to responsibly manage. I can turn off notifications to this thread and stop reading the parts both useful and the ones terrible if the community over-all disagrees with my opinions and think that the topic absolutely belongs in the discussion thread instead. I’m just saying…

To me specifically, the subject matter absolutely makes both of these things being in the SAME threads inaccessible to continue reading through on a regular and unprepared basis. If that’s NOT an experience unique to me (and it may very well be unique to me) it just seemed to be at least worth mentioning/asking as a way to keep City of Glass discourse available for participation in ways that are not emotionally and mentally detrimental in what I’m assuming are not intended to be either.

Roz

@Jenn said in City of Glass - Discussion:

@Roz said in City of Glass - Discussion:

Rough and Rowdy isn’t for sensitive topics, it’s for a rougher approach to topics.

It is a sensitive topic. A change of venue isn’t because people are saying mean things.

Right, I wasn’t saying that it’s not a sensitive topic. I said that the Rough and Rowdy forum isn’t meant to be a place that sensitive topics need to go. When someone asks for a post to be moved to R&R, that is actually usually saying that people are getting mean in the thread, because R&R is for people to get snarky.

That’s why I was just saying that if the non-CoG discussion does get moved, it shouldn’t get moved there specifically.

Jenn

@Roz The where, at least to me, is mostly irrelevevant. I’m not at all invested into where forum-wise the thread is moved. Staying in this particular forum and just forked to CoG - Mental Manipulation/OOC Behaviors, or something else along those lines would be totally cool by me. I’d just like to be able to know which headspace to be aware of and ready for prior to reading new additions if that’s something that would be ok. If it’s not ok, I’ll find other ways to manage the issues that are less impactful on the words and choices of others instead.

Tez

Hm hm. I’m sympathetic to wanting to split out that discussion but I think the part that is about WHY someone was banned makes sense to keep in this thread. I’ll make my best effort and please no one. Give me a few.

Meg

@Tez i am pleased

pleased

Cobalt

@Livia Yeah, probably Juerg who considered himself a dom and had a fetish for using mind magic on people to both influence their emotions and dampen them. Also huge anal fetish and wouldn’t take “no” for an answer with it being a thing in his TS.

Val

@Cobalt said in Royal Paynes:

@Livia Yeah, probably Juerg who considered himself a dom and had a fetish for using mind magic on people to both influence their emotions and dampen them. Also huge anal fetish and wouldn’t take “no” for an answer with it being a thing in his TS.

excuse me

That was not on my Bingo card.

Cobalt

@Val I can’t really remember the full details of the conversations, but I once had a conversation with him on Shang where he asked me (ooc me, not my character) if I was a submissive or a slave, and when I expressed I wasn’t into anal he was very much like ‘it has to be the anal, it HAS to be’.

Years later when he had sexual relationship with one of my characters he didn’t even ask either IC or OOC before posing well …