Liberation Drama!?

[hellfrog]

@Gashlycrumb I’m sorry this went this way for you, I think you really set the wrong tone by opening up by calling yourself ‘legitimately extremely annoying’ and a ‘horrible person’.

I’m gonna try a little rock em sock em both sides, though. As a staffer, if you knew that turning someone down/telling them they were being too much was likely to get you called abusive and stupid and whatever else…would you be eager to have that conversation? Would you want to put it at the top of your to-do? It’s not good behavior, but it’s understandable behavior, isn’t it? It’s at least as understandable as being cheesed off when your +requests are not getting answered in a timely fashion – which is a valid reason to be cheesed off!

[Pavel]

Avoiding a problem is so much easier than confronting said problem, particularly when you can always justify the avoidance by assuring yourself that there’s so many more important things to do…

It’s even easier-er if that problem walks and talks and insists on itself.

[Gashlycrumb]

@hellfrog Yeah;. What I was getting at with that is that even if a player is annoying and horrible, it’s not good practice to just leave them twisting. That is to say that, even in cases where it’s understandable, it’s crap.

@hellfrog said:

As a staffer, if you knew that turning someone down/telling them they were being too much was likely to get you called abusive and stupid and whatever else…would you be eager to have that conversation? Would you want to put it at the top of your to-do?

Turning someone down, or telling them they’re being too much, or even just telling them to re-read the theme guidelines and not app an elf into an elf-free world is likely to get that response. I did know it when I was staffing. I knew it would happen before it happened, which was practically day one. (It was an elf.) If you are staffing an open game it’s going to happen.

Did I like it? No. Did I worry about it? No. Did I take a few moments to be chill and centered before I told people stuff like that? Yes. Did this mean I didn’t do it instantly? Yes. Did this mean I might even put it off 'til tomorrow? Yes.

Did this mean I’d decide to just not do it at all and hope the player went away? NO. Absolutely fucking not. It is understandable that I might want to, but it’d be mean and harmful to actually do that. If that player is waiting and waiting for a response from me they are experiencing frustration every time they log on and find no answer. It builds up. The player is gonna get cheesed off and it’s likely that they will, understandably, act like they’re cheesed off. The scent of cheese permeates. Pretty soon the vibe is in shambles, and it’d be my fucking fault for consciously and unnecessarily aggravating somebody instead of doing a part of the staffing job that’s not fun.

Grasp the nettle firmly, for fucks’ sake.

[Wyrmsign]

“No.” is a complete sentence.

[Gashlycrumb]

@Wyrmsign said:

“No.” is a complete sentence.

Who said it?

[Pavel]

@Gashlycrumb said:

It builds up. The player is gonna get cheesed off and it’s likely that they will, understandably, act like they’re cheesed off.

While that is true and just as understandable, to me, as the staffer’s inability to deal with confrontation with irritable/irritating players… you as the player are responsible for your actions here just as you’re, rightly, holding the staffer responsible for their actions.

The best approach is to leave, not to cause more problems. Either the staffer is intentionally ignoring you, or their backlog is so bad that it’s negatively impacting you. Either way, you leave and hope for better elsewhere. Then you come here and bitch about it with your moral superiority intact.