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    Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved No Escape from Reality
    696 Posts 88 Posters 283.3k Views 5 Watching
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    • WizzW Offline
      Wizz @Testament
      last edited by

      @Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

      “Family doesn’t give you special privileges, especially if we don’t talk save beyond one holiday a year.”

      Our family has always had a very different dynamic than that, we all live pretty close and go out of our way to see each other at least a couple times a month, which is why it felt extra hurtful.

      It definitely would have been a better and wiser choice to not have any of us that involved either way, but it’s whatever. She’s very young, it was all sort of done in a rush, I can get over it but it just stings for now.

      SnacknessS 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • SnacknessS Offline
        Snackness @Wizz
        last edited by

        @Wizz I’m sorry, that sounds really stressful.

        My totally unsolicited ‘been a bride’ advice is, if you decide talk to her about it, give it a couple of weeks. Weddings are stressful af, even the good ones.

        WizzW 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
        • WizzW Offline
          Wizz @Snackness
          last edited by

          @Snackness

          I appreciate the advice, and have definitely felt it’s something I should give a little time to sit with before I say anything, if I even do. I am not the type to just immediately storm into a confrontation if something makes me upset anyway, and I can certainly see why it would only harm both of us in this case especially. It was a lovely wedding despite my feels getting hurt, and they deserve the time to come down from the stress of all the preparation and enjoy the honeymoon.

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
          • saoS Offline
            sao
            last edited by

            My 16 1/2 year old cat is gone and I don’t know how long it’s going to take me to be OK.

            let it be a challenge to you

            juniperskyJ T 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 17
            • juniperskyJ Offline
              junipersky Administrators @sao
              last edited by

              @sao

              It is okay if it takes time. Even if it takes a long time.

              I’m sorry.

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 3
              • T Offline
                Testament @sao
                last edited by

                @sao You’re not going to be okay. And that in of itself is okay, everyone is allowed to feel this. It won’t be easy, believe me. Losing my old man cat two years ago tore me apart. And there are days where I still horribly miss him. The first two weeks were the worst. But it does get easier. I don’t know if it’ll ever completely go away, but like so many other things, it becomes something we manage.

                Someone else said it here that I believe is rather fitting. “Grief is just love with nowhere to go.”

                every day gets a little better

                I don’t know what I’m doing. Poke at Seven Nations sevennations.aresmush.com port 2021

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • AshkuriA Offline
                  Ashkuri
                  last edited by Ashkuri

                  This post is deleted!
                  TezT SnacknessS PavelP T 4 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 9
                  • TezT Offline
                    Tez Administrators @Ashkuri
                    last edited by

                    @imstillhere Fuck, of course you’re tired. I got sympathy-tired halfway through reading and it just got MORE from there. I hope things calm down for you.

                    she/they

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                    • SnacknessS Offline
                      Snackness @Ashkuri
                      last edited by

                      @imstillhere I’m so sorry. We’re all here for you.

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 3
                      • PavelP Offline
                        Pavel @Ashkuri
                        last edited by Pavel

                        @imstillhere Given I don’t know where you are I can’t adequately advise on resources to help.

                        However, find your local university and see if they offer a psychology or counselling program. If they do, then they very likely have a supervised student counselling clinic - much the same as a regular counsellor though usually far cheaper.

                        ETA: When you’ve reached the “solve a problem or make a change” part of grief and stress, of course.

                        He/Him. Opinions and views are solely my own unless specifically stated otherwise.
                        BE AN ADULT

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                        • T Offline
                          Testament @Ashkuri
                          last edited by

                          @imstillhere You already know what I’m gonna say, because I’ve talked to about a lot of this already.

                          But you got my Discord. Any time you need to talk again, even if it’s just to get something off your chest. I know it’s not a lot I can give, but whatever you need, I’m here.

                          I don’t know what I’m doing. Poke at Seven Nations sevennations.aresmush.com port 2021

                          ArkandelA 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                          • ArkandelA Offline
                            Arkandel @Testament
                            last edited by

                            My cat is… gone.

                            He had surgery yesterday, and it was successful. He came home with an appetite and kind of stoned.

                            This morning he was at the kitchen mewing at me to give him his wet food. I let the dogs out into the back yard (as I do every morning, this is absolute routine), let them in, had breakfast. I went to the gym and came back.

                            And he’s nowhere to be found. Nowhere in the house - and we’ve looked everywhere. No coming out for food, not responding to calls. Nowhere in the fenced back yard, or any of the neighbors’ (whose doors I went and knocked on, and let them know, just in case he somehow made it there). He’s just… not in the house, and I don’t know where he could be.

                            I don’t remember what happened because it’s so routine to let the dogs out, feed the cats, eat and get out of the house. I do it every single morning. Did I leave the door open and he snuck out? He’s not a runner at all but did I, did he? Did he have a stroke following the surgery and he’s dead in a closet somewhere to be found days from now?

                            Goddammit Gus. I’ve made flyers and filed a report, he’s microchipped, I spoke to the neighbors but not knowing is… it’d be easier if I knew he was hurt. And thinking he’s outside hiding somewhere perhaps a couple of yards away freezing…

                            tsarT N 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 2
                            • tsarT Offline
                              tsar @Arkandel
                              last edited by

                              @Arkandel Ah fuck, I’m so sorry.

                              ArkandelA 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                              • ArkandelA Offline
                                Arkandel @tsar
                                last edited by

                                @tsar … He was in a fucking dresser drawer.

                                The whole fucking day. While I was outside freezing my ass off looking for him, and stressing the fuck out.

                                Motherfucker.

                                SnacknessS RozR tsarT N P 8 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 21
                                • SnacknessS Offline
                                  Snackness @Arkandel
                                  last edited by

                                  @Arkandel I’m so happy to hear that! Man, cats are assholes aren’t they.

                                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 4
                                  • RozR Online
                                    Roz @Arkandel
                                    last edited by

                                    @Arkandel said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

                                    @tsar … He was in a fucking dresser drawer.

                                    The whole fucking day. While I was outside freezing my ass off looking for him, and stressing the fuck out.

                                    Motherfucker.

                                    omfg. cATS.

                                    she/her | playlist

                                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 4
                                    • tsarT Offline
                                      tsar @Arkandel
                                      last edited by

                                      @Arkandel said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

                                      @tsar … He was in a fucking dresser drawer.

                                      The whole fucking day. While I was outside freezing my ass off looking for him, and stressing the fuck out.

                                      Motherfucker.

                                      oh my god, fucking cats, why are they like this???

                                      I’m so glad you found him. ❤ ❤

                                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 3
                                      • N Offline
                                        Nynrose @Arkandel
                                        last edited by Nynrose

                                        This post is deleted!
                                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • N Offline
                                          Nynrose @Arkandel
                                          last edited by

                                          @Arkandel I am glad you fond your cat ❤

                                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                          • P Offline
                                            Pyrephox Administrators @Arkandel
                                            last edited by

                                            @Arkandel OMG, I’m so glad this update was here. I’m so glad he’s home and a giant fuzzy jerk.

                                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 3

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