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MU Peeves Thread
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@sao Totally! Nothing wrong with people who like them. If people can make it work I’m happy for them to get what they want. I /can/ play polyamorous types (see the fact I prefer playing hookers). I just don’t often have fun with it.
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@shit-piss-love said in MU Peeves Thread:
- I’m This Character: I’ve noticed that some people choose to present as their character for both IC and OOC purposes. I sort of do this myself, though it’s less that I feel like I want people to associate with me OOCly through the avatar of my character and more that I have a near zero tolerance for breaching my identity firewall.
People just do this on channels tho
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@icanbeyourmuse I understand the point you’re making but it’s a little uncomfortable that your reasoning here is equating polyamorous people with sex workers
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@Roz said in MU Peeves Thread:
@shit-piss-love said in MU Peeves Thread:
- I’m This Character: I’ve noticed that some people choose to present as their character for both IC and OOC purposes. I sort of do this myself, though it’s less that I feel like I want people to associate with me OOCly through the avatar of my character and more that I have a near zero tolerance for breaching my identity firewall.
People just do this on channels tho
Totally. I think what I mean is that for some people, they want to like, be their character hanging out with other people’s characters in an OOC fashion rather than being their character talking on a channel while at the same time playing. I’m just trying to be careful with what I’m saying because I don’t want to go visiting someone’s intentions out of turn.
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I think OOC rooms are just a relic of an older time. I don’t like or dislike them, I think if anything, it’s another option. But then again, I also like Idle room that cut off all communication except for pages. So I want to be on the game, but I’m currently in the middle of something else.
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@sao Its the only ‘clear cut’ polyamorous type I know off hand. My brain can only think of so many things on the spot. I mean, most monogamous relationships in my head are ‘marriages’. I /know/ they are not the only ones. When I am trying to be clear I use the most ‘known’ association. So, monogamy I would say ‘marriage’ as an example and unless I am spending time to consider options, courtesans/hookers/etc are my ‘quick’ got to for polyamory. I mean if you go with ‘mainstream’ polyamorous is basically polygamy. As I’ve said previously, many of the people I seem to end up around are poly and want relationships as such (the closer ones make exceptions for me and I attempt to make exceptions for them in return)
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@Testament said in MU Peeves Thread:
I think OOC rooms are just a relic of an older time. I don’t like or dislike them, I think if anything, it’s another option. But then again, I also like Idle room that cut off all communication except for pages. So I want to be on the game, but I’m currently in the middle of something else.
Yeah I think some of it is definitely convention. I got my start in the wider hobby of online RP through the DALnet IRC network in the early 90s. In there it was common, since it was often a single channel, for there to be a drifting in and out of IC/OOC and when people would be in “OOC mode” they were still their characters.
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@icanbeyourmuse Not to get too off track, but sex work doesn’t make someone poly. Sex workers can be monogamous. It’s just a job it has nothing to do with their relationship preferences. Polyamory is about romantic relationships. Also just as a note, the term ‘hooker’ is not preferred by full service sex workers.
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@farfalla said in MU Peeves Thread:
@icanbeyourmuse Not to get too off track, but sex work doesn’t make someone poly. Sex workers can be monogamous. It’s just a job it has nothing to do with their relationship preferences. Polyamory is about romantic relationships. Also just as a note, the term ‘hooker’ is not preferred by full service sex workers.
I know a lot of sex workers. Almost all of them are in monogamous relationships. They’re not “dating” the people they go on dates with in the same way that therapists are not friends with their patients. (There’s actually a ton of parallel in those two professions but that’s a whole other topic.)
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These misunderstandings are a big part of why I was NO PLS about sex work as a job on Arx. Even well meaning people don’t always handle it kindly.
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@farfalla said in MU Peeves Thread:
Also just as a note, the term ‘hooker’ is not preferred by full service sex workers.
That’s definitely a regional/cultural thing. It’s widely used in the community out here.
“The community” meaning the sex-work community.
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@Pavel I am not a sex worker in any region, so I don’t know personally, but I have heard sex workers ask other people not to use it. They use it themselves, but I don’t get to say it. Etc. So it’s easy to just err on the side of not hurting anyone, yk.
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@farfalla said in MU Peeves Thread:
@Pavel I am not a sex worker in any region, so I don’t know personally, but I have heard sex workers ask other people not to use it. They use it themselves, but I don’t get to say it. Etc. So it’s easy to just err on the side of not hurting anyone, yk.
Oh, absolutely. Simply commenting on the neat differences between cultures, not trying to prescribe use.
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Bought new phones today because mine is overheating like woah.
Why does my galaxy s22 feel lighter and cheaper than my s9 did? I can’t decide if I trust it more because it isn’t as heavy and glass-y. Or if it just feels easy to bend and break.
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On popular request: The story of the girl who thought she was marrying my partner.
So, this was back in the 1990s – 'round 96 if I remember correctly. The date matters because cybersecurity and whatnot really wasn’t a big thing yet. Partner and I both played on LegendMUD.
Partner hung out a lot with a chick from Detroit and her friends. I had my crowd I went stabbing things with so nothing unusual there.
One day, a large care package arrived. Chocolate, a vinyl with ‘our song’, Red Sox kit (partner has no interest in hockey), scented candles.
In retrospect, this is where we should have started to question but, we weren’t really sure what to think.
Then she announced to partner that she’d bought the plane tickets and was arriving in a couple of weeks. Couldn’t wait to get married!
That, of course, rang all the alarm bells and set off an investigation on the game – where I was a builder at the time so I had a pretty decent rapport with the admins.
Partner had complained a few times that they lost gear or logged into the game somewhere else than expected. They’re a forgetful type though, so…
So the admins looked through paging history and private correspondence. And it turned out that some other guy from Denmark had been logging the character in and, to be blunt, convinced this American girl to come to Denmark to marry him.
This is where the obvious question is, how the hell can I trust partner to not be the culprit? Well. To be just as blunt again – partner’s English levels aren’t up to what those pages and letters contained.
Needless to say there was quite an uproar. Girl accused partner of abuse and gaslighting – other guy denied everything – and obviously, the trip to Europe was cancelled, more so when girl found out that partner and I were in fact already married.
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@L-B-Heuschkel said in MU Peeves Thread:
On popular request: The story of the girl who thought she was marrying my partner.
So, this was back in the 1990s – 'round 96 if I remember correctly. The date matters because cybersecurity and whatnot really wasn’t a big thing yet. Partner and I both played on LegendMUD.
Partner hung out a lot with a chick from Detroit and her friends. I had my crowd I went stabbing things with so nothing unusual there.
One day, a large care package arrived. Chocolate, a vinyl with ‘our song’, Red Sox kit (partner has no interest in hockey), scented candles.
In retrospect, this is where we should have started to question but, we weren’t really sure what to think.
Then she announced to partner that she’d bought the plane tickets and was arriving in a couple of weeks. Couldn’t wait to get married!
That, of course, rang all the alarm bells and set off an investigation on the game – where I was a builder at the time so I had a pretty decent rapport with the admins.
Partner had complained a few times that they lost gear or logged into the game somewhere else than expected. They’re a forgetful type though, so…
So the admins looked through paging history and private correspondence. And it turned out that some other guy from Denmark had been logging the character in and, to be blunt, convinced this American girl to come to Denmark to marry him.
This is where the obvious question is, how the hell can I trust partner to not be the culprit? Well. To be just as blunt again – partner’s English levels aren’t up to what those pages and letters contained.
Needless to say there was quite an uproar. Girl accused partner of abuse and gaslighting – other guy denied everything – and obviously, the trip to Europe was cancelled, more so when girl found out that partner and I were in fact already married.
Whoa
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Very much not the point of the story but
Red Sox kit (partner has no interest in hockey)
made me laugh out loud partially because the Sox are baseball but mostly because it really drove home the point of how little partner cared about them. -
Romance is a hard one for me.
I enjoy flirtation and romantic tension, and a lot of my characters can be flirty and or quietly pine for someone they have a crush on, because those feelings are just delicious for me.
But I’m generally not all that interested in either a blissfully happy romantic relationship //or// a jealous/cheaty romantic relationship, IC. A relationship that has some very interesting challenges or inherent struggles that are tied to a greater, more adventurous plot? Absolutely! But honestly, even people who like IC ‘drama’ tend to be more on board with “oh no, my/your character has fallen for someone else! What do?” than “Our characters may be into each other, but we also stand on opposite sides of this divide that can’t be handwaved away or overcome with the Power Of Friendship - what happens to our relationship when we have to oppose each other’s ambition?”
I tend to consider romantic RP to be just another avenue for interesting plot and IC excitement, and because I do like conflict and tension, I get very, very wary about people who seem too invested in the “love story” between two characters.
I’ve also discovered that since I instituted a quiet rule that my PC doesn’t get romantically involved with any other PC who spends less than half the time showing interest in my character’s thoughts/goals/feelings than they do either talking about themselves or talking about how much they want to bang, the pool of people who would even be eligible for romantic play has shrunk immensely.
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@Pyrephox Any kind of romantic storyline should be supplemental to the character’s story and development, not all-encompassing. When you’re IC relationship is pretty much how the character’s personality is defined by, that’s the kind of thing you don’t or shouldn’t be involved in.
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@Testament I think that if someone is only interested in romantic RP, that is perfectly fine. The problem isn’t someone wanting the romance to play a big part in the story. It is about everyone being upfront about what they are looking for. If one person is mostly interested in playing out IC romance and the other is more interested in adventure, then that is just an incompatibility. I don’t think we need to go as far as to say that someone who wants to RP romantic plots is wrong. It’s just not what you want to do.