Don’t forget we moved!
https://brandmu.day/
Bannings
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obligatory fuck ghost and yes let us shun him.
While I appreciate the sentiment, if he does turn up here he’ll be as welcome as the rest of us, unless and until he does something against our rules. The same with anyone else.
Just for the record, I do actually disagree with this. It used to be my stance. ‘oh they haven’t done anything /here/’ and that I thought was totally fair. But it also enables access for abusive people into spaces. Which isn’t to say I think people should be instabanned, much as that might make us feel momentarily better, but I think past behaviour should absolutely be taken into consideration. If someone with hugely problematic behaviour elsewhere turns up, and is given a chance, and shows that same behaviour I don’t think we should pretend that this is their first offense etc.
When someone shows you who they are, over and over again? Believe them.
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obligatory fuck ghost and yes let us shun him.
While I appreciate the sentiment, if he does turn up here he’ll be as welcome as the rest of us, unless and until he does something against our rules. The same with anyone else.
Just for the record, I do actually disagree with this. It used to be my stance. ‘oh they haven’t done anything /here/’ and that I thought was totally fair. But it also enables access for abusive people into spaces. Which isn’t to say I think people should be instabanned, much as that might make us feel momentarily better, but I think past behaviour should absolutely be taken into consideration. If someone with hugely problematic behaviour elsewhere turns up, and is given a chance, and shows that same behaviour I don’t think we should pretend that this is their first offense etc.
I appreciate that you disagree, but it’s the decision we made. Past behavior will be taken into account for all forum members because we are all humans who do things like that. But for now, all are welcome.
she/they
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Why do you consistently feel the need to defend people that actively hurt and intentionally abuse other people?
I think this is actually very understandable, because they themselves were accused of intentionally breaking rules/lying about it. It’s natural to feel defensive and to extend that to other people.
Even if misguided when it comes to some individuals.
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obligatory fuck ghost and yes let us shun him.
While I appreciate the sentiment, if he does turn up here he’ll be as welcome as the rest of us, unless and until he does something against our rules. The same with anyone else.
Just for the record, I do actually disagree with this. It used to be my stance. ‘oh they haven’t done anything /here/’ and that I thought was totally fair. But it also enables access for abusive people into spaces. Which isn’t to say I think people should be instabanned, much as that might make us feel momentarily better, but I think past behaviour should absolutely be taken into consideration. If someone with hugely problematic behaviour elsewhere turns up, and is given a chance, and shows that same behaviour I don’t think we should pretend that this is their first offense etc.
I appreciate that you disagree, but it’s the decision we made. Past behavior will be taken into account for all forum members because we are all humans who do things like that. But for now, all are welcome.
Oh, I’m not saying change the policy. Or throwing rocks until you do like a howler monkey kicking a 20 year smoking habit. Just saying that I disagree and why, and that I hope I’ll be wrong and people will behave responsibly.
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I miss p of Rinel.
Anyway, hoping that eventually all this will settle down and you can all be pals again.
- What the heck did Macha do that you all hate her so much? I have no idea who she is but it seems like some kind of seriously historic grudge.
- If it’s anything like what happened to VulgarKitten, who you are all still apparently ripping to shreds while not caring at all about the game runner exploitation that was perpetrated against her, then I think you need to get over it.
- Hopefully if p of Rinel sees this someday, she will know that I still care about her. :')
Hobos is an avid reader of MSB. He knows exactly what went down. He’s now come over here to ask some questions that he already knows the answer to that are likely to kick at people’s emotions again when they’re raw.
Don’t give that to him.
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@tsar Right? I read that post immediately and was like
lol lmao
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@Rathenhope I need the picture. I NEED THE PICTURE. YOU KNOW THE ONE.
she/they
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I miss p of Rinel.
Anyway, hoping that eventually all this will settle down and you can all be pals again.
- What the heck did Macha do that you all hate her so much? I have no idea who she is but it seems like some kind of seriously historic grudge.
- If it’s anything like what happened to VulgarKitten, who you are all still apparently ripping to shreds while not caring at all about the game runner exploitation that was perpetrated against her, then I think you need to get over it.
- Hopefully if p of Rinel sees this someday, she will know that I still care about her. :')
Hobos is an avid reader of MSB. He knows exactly what went down. He’s now come over here to ask some questions that he already knows the answer to that are likely to kick at people’s emotions again when they’re raw.
Don’t give that to him.
Eh, I’m gonna give him the benefit of the doubt. I also hope that the community can all be pals eventually and that Rinel comes back.
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@Meg I appreciate your optimism, even I don’t share it. If there’s something I’ve learned aboit the mushing community, is that many have long memories and hold grudges.
Not to say all, but I’ve seen it more often than not.
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I know you think VulgarKitten is lying to me about how she was actually the one pursued initially in that manner and simply did not wish to reveal who she was. We don’t really need to rehash this, but I believe her, having seen enough of Corban-player’s behavior back when I played, and –
I saw the logs on reddit and that last comment from farfalla was a bit argumentative, kind of ‘okay Macha doesn’t want to talk to me, I’ll get the last word in and then block her’ so I can see how anyone would be annoyed by it and want the offender to receive a warning at least.
And alright, Macha was a problem player 10 years ago and you thought maybe she was just young and stupid but now she’s a crybaby pulling a manipulative routine? The logic doesn’t make sense. Maybe she was young and stupid and now she’s just being a normal person who doesn’t like being annoyed and will stand up for herself?
Why do I feel the need to defend them? I mean, I am pretty sure they feel actively hurt and intentionally abused, too. I saw some talk earlier about how ‘if everyone says this about you, maybe you should reflect a bit’… well, “everyone” on other corners of the internet that have even heard of MSB have pretty much the same things to say about it, or at least they had. I know you’ve heard these things so I won’t repeat them, but I’m just suggesting… to do some self-examination.
When people hide who they are in order to avoid your ridicule, maybe they are horrible predators… or maybe they are just normal people who make normal mistakes like we all do and don’t want to be beholden to the extremely long memory and tribal attitudes here. The only reason I don’t hide who I am is because I have pride issues about my personal integrity, especially when it comes to potentially being attacked.
Also, don’t worry, I don’t feel dogpiled. I went into this with my guard up, expecting worse than you’ve given. From what I’ve seen, you are a people with boundless empathy, but you choose who to direct that towards.
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What’s funny is, I meant what I told Macha on the MSB thread: I genuinely had assumed that she was not the same player she had been in those days. When she chatted on MSB I generally assumed that she was, like me, just a player going about her business. Who among us is the same player we were in 2011? In 2004?
She just publicly demonstrated how wrong and dumb I was. By going after people I genuinely care about.
So yeah you right it is raw.
And Rinel: Fighting injustice is her whole goddamn life. I hope she’s still out there in the world making the first name proud. 6th amendment represent.
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@Rathenhope I need the picture. I NEED THE PICTURE. YOU KNOW THE ONE.
the only picture i NEED is the one @Herja just posted; it’s the only thing in this thread i can see now, and that’s fantastic
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@Tez I am no Rath but I know what you need.
fr fr
(she/her) -
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@hobos If the issue was MSB’s reputation, and people had concern over their identity being linked to past behavior, and if everyone was welcome to create a ‘new board’ and ‘new communities breed competition and ideas’ and ‘everyone is welcome to present their ideas to MSB’…
… then why didn’t the people there who wanted the community to go in a new direction simply not make their own new one? Why did the people who wanted a ‘fresh start/clean slate’ not join this new community? Why is ‘everyone welcome’ except for the people they banned?
Why do the rules they are so quick to proclaim and insist are great and just not equally applied? And why are they so quick and insistent on rewriting what happened without allowing people to correct them?
Mummy Pun? MUMMY PUN!
She/her -
@hobos but even setting Corban-player aside, he wasn’t the only one she lied to, gaslit, or broke NCOs against.
I don’t even disagree that Corban-player or even Apostate have their own sets of problematic behaviors. We all do, to some extent, some a lot more than others. But there is a line between that and ‘bad actor’…
Anyways, on the topic of Macha, I would agree her response went into a bit of argument, but so did /Macha’s/ when she said not to continue it.
That’s like saying ‘hey, I hate you and think you’re stupid. Please don’t continue this.’ And then being upset that someone says, ‘hey I think you’re stupid. But ok.’
If Macha had just said. ‘I don’t want to talk to you in DMs anymore, please don’t continue this.’ And farfalla had said more than ‘message received’, then I actually would have had a different opinion on this subject, believe it or not.
But as it is, it was more complicated.
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I know you think VulgarKitten is lying to me about how she was actually the one pursued initially in that manner and simply did not wish to reveal who she was. We don’t really need to rehash this, but I believe her, having seen enough of Corban-player’s behavior back when I played, and –
I don’t necessarily believe that’s a lie? It’s just irrelevant. If you have an NCO and the other party doesn’t know who you are, you are the one responsible for not engaging if someone else reaches out. The game has plenty of options for this. You absolutely cannot say “Well I know this person has an NCO with me as a player, but they paged me, so I can now do whatever I want, including hopping back into an IC romantic relationship.”
But as Meg pointed out, there were numerous people that she aggressively lied to that were not Corban. Why don’t you care about any of that?
I saw the logs on reddit and that last comment from farfalla was a bit argumentative, kind of ‘okay Macha doesn’t want to talk to me, I’ll get the last word in and then block her’ so I can see how anyone would be annoyed by it and want the offender to receive a warning at least.
You think someone should receive a warning for being a “bit argumentative”? Or for blocking someone who no longer wants contact with them? This all happened because Macha went into someone’s DMs to drag their friend. The conversation lulled multiple times and could have been dropped at any point. Macha is the one who felt the need to pick it back up and yell on her way out. Farfalla just yelled back to close the conversation, and then it was closed. It was a tiff at best. It was not, as Ganymede tried to frame it, some form of harassment. Because that is what the rule against contacting someone who doesn’t want contact with you is meant to combat: actual harassment. Not protect you after you started a fight with someone and didn’t like their response at the end.
And alright, Macha was a problem player 10 years ago and you thought maybe she was just young and stupid but now she’s a crybaby pulling a manipulative routine? The logic doesn’t make sense. Maybe she was young and stupid and now she’s just being a normal person who doesn’t like being annoyed and will stand up for herself?
The person who called her a crybaby is not one of the people who was on a game with her 10 years ago. Different posters on the board have different experiences with her.
I’m not mad at what Macha did ten years ago. I’m not the person I was ten years ago and I assumed she wasn’t, either. I’m annoyed because I was clearly wrong based on her current behavior.
How was she standing up for herself? I wasn’t bothering her. I wasn’t speaking to her or engaging with her or talking about her when she DMed Farfalla to tell her how terrible I am and how Farfalla shouldn’t like or trust me. What fight or conflict was happening that she needed to stand up for herself for? She was under no scrutiny until she took actions that people objected to.
And I wouldn’t have even cared or dragged it up publicly if it had just remained a private conversation between two people. Like, yeah, I would have been like “Wow, okay, Macha hasn’t actually grown up in the intervening 10 years,” but I would have continued doing the exact same thing I was doing: just leaving her alone and not engaging with her. It was because she then went and got someone banned for it. She baited someone into continuing a conversation with her repeatedly and then went and claimed that the person was refusing to stop talking to her.
