Don’t forget we moved!
https://brandmu.day/
Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent
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Round two of adult kid testing positive, yay back to setting up containment zones.
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@mietze it feels so weird upvoting that but you know I mean oh noooo
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@sao Kind of makes one wish for perhaps not a ‘downvote’ button, but maybe a ‘oh no’ or ‘that sucks’ button.
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So, my dog has been living with my parents the last couple years because when I moved back to the area during covid, I moved in with a friend in their apartment that doesn’t allow dogs (and a 90lb husky is kind of hard to hide). We were supposed to be moving somewhere that would allow dogs. That was two years ago.
My dad regularly sends me texts to guilt me about my dog, who I already hate not having for this long, and the last time was a couple days ago, where he tells me that my dog is making him depressed, adding that I should rehome him since I already haven’t had him for several years. That thought kills me, but I CAN see his point. He can’t see my regular panic attacks about this, and he probably wouldn’t believe me if I told him about them.
I don’t know what to do. Housing is obviously out of control and my friend is too stressed out by work to move, so it’d just be me. Even if I could find an apartment that allowed a giant husky (they’re a restricted breed most places), a 1 bedroom is like $1k a month and you have to make 3x that to get approved, which I do not. I COULD but it would be a fast track to burnout and dark thoughts. I’d also have to buy a more reliable car in the near future.
What’s more frustrating is that if I could afford a house (with the right zoning), I could just open up shop there (I’m a reluctant dog groomer) and probably be fine. But I can’t afford that, either.
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Growing up in the 80s/90s with ADHD was hell.
https://unrollthread.com/t/1534592771792572418/
edit: i doubt it’s much better now
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Depends on the area. I have a child who is clearly adhd, but unofficially diagnosed because there is a 9+ month waiting list for pediatric neuropsych evaluations appointment setting (which means waiting 1-4 months after that for the appointment) in my area unless its an emergency. He is impacted enough though that he is getting services via the public schools (and this should show how impactful to himself and classroom environment it is since the bar for that also is extremely high also in our area due to shortages).
However I would say there is a high degree of awareness than there was went i was growing up in the 70s/80s !and when I first started working with children in the 90s. Its not enough of course but its night and day. I knew to seek private OT for my kid and while that had a 6 month waiting list we were able to get him in. Theres a lot of parent and teacher support even in ECE that there simply was not when I was working on my bachelors in family and child development and entering the ECE field 30 years ago. I volunteered 25+ hours a week in my older kiddos school program that has a lot of neurodivergent kids in it and while I did see more awareness there it still wasn’t on the level I see now with my youngest who is in a neighborhood school.
However, I mean–my district and area isn’t the best but its not the absolute crappiest and I personally feel the awareness is aided by the change in demographics which include a lot of now-parents who had to cope/grow up with no understanding as kids with adhd or on the spectrum or whatever but were able to push through but want something way better for tgeir kids.
I don’t know that it makes anything “easier” per se, but at least as a parent i see lots more people looking with a lot more empathy and awareness.
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That’s actually very heartening to hear. We have our first kid on the way and with being ADHD/somewhere on the spectrum I know it’s a high chance they’ll be saddled with something too.
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My elder brother’s main aide has covid. Mom told youngest sister (who lives with her) but told her not to tell the rest of us. Obviously youngest sister ignored that (FOR GOOD FUCKING REASON WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER MOTHER) and we know now.
Brother doesn’t seem to think this is a problem and I have a tiny terrible thought that he WANTS to get Covid. He has such diminished lung capacity that he is likely he works die from it.
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@junipersky said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
told her not to tell the rest of us. Obviously youngest sister ignored that (FOR GOOD FUCKING REASON WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER MOTHER) and we know now.
This is such a hard place to be as a sibling, I feel you. I don’t know exactly why a lot of parents do this aside from some misplaced desire to protect their children maybe, and wouldn’t hazard to speak for your mom, but with ours it certainly has felt more than a little bit infantalizing especially as we all move into our late twenties and thirties.
Really hope the aide can recover without spreading it and things work out.
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@junipersky said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
I have a tiny terrible thought that he WANTS to get Covid.
I am recovering from what was ultimately a mild case after ducking this gd virus for the past two years, and it’s so annoying. I’m not SICK. I’m just TIRED.
The random sweating and anosmia cleared up, but the continued and sudden onset of sheer exhaustion is so fucking frustrating. I would like to not need a nap just because I walked up one flight of stairs.
It feels like a dumb thing to whine about since people are still literally dying of Covid - which makes it even worse, since it makes me nothing more than an exhausted Whiny McPouterson whose first world problem is being sleepy, wahhh! - but I think a lot fewer people would be willing to lick doorknobs if they had to suffer the inconvenient symptoms rather than the life-threatening ones.
If you wanna know what Covid feels like to me, stay up for three days straight and then try to do long division.
faceplant
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It’s not even just the doorknob lickers getting it. I’ve got some friends who have gotten in 3 TIMES now. They both work fully remote jobs. They live in the exurbs. They could easily structure their life to avoid getting it. But instead they are taking flights to visit family on the other side of the country regularly, going out to eat at crowded restaurants and shit.
Their lives to live how they want but I just don’t get it. We don’t know the long-term effects of Long Covid but there’s plenty of evidence that it can have long term fog brain effects. Fuck if I’m gonna put my life quality and ability to work effectively in my career at risk to see Incubus play.
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Medical scares where the paramedics gaslight you and try to tell you that you’re just having an anxiety attack because they see you’re a woman that lives home alone, and have probably had a million calls over the evening of just that sort of scenario so they’ve already prejudged your situation, when you’re having a real medical emergency are fun, ya’ll.
Low potassium is not as fun. By a long shot. I’m ok though and that’s what counts.
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I am trying to get over it, but I’m honestly mad af.
My little sister and I work together.
Yesterday she gets the text we all hate from the principal saying “Can you come talk to me at x time” without any context, and even when she asks what about, zero response.
THIS SHOULD NOT BE OKAY BUT IS OVERSHADOWED BY THIS NEXT BIT.
Sister goes to meeting and principal starts out, “A parent teacher out with me about a concern.” Sister puts her hands on the desk, concerned, and that’s when principal pauses looking at her hands.
See, the day before one of our questioning middle schoolers drew a little rainbow on sister’s hand. Sister was proud this kiddo felt like they could be their authentic self and let her do it. A real human connection was made with this kiddo.
Principal goes, “That’s it?” Sister is confused and looks at hand. Principal goes on to say, “A parent complained that in dropoff (when the parents are bringing their kids to school. Sister stands and waves them forward or has them stop so kids can cross the crosswalk) you were sharing your political opinion and they found it inappropriate. I assume that,” the hand, “is what they were talking about?”
Sister looks at hand again and then explains about the middle schooler. Principal goes, “Cool, that’s all I needed then.”
Minute and a half meeting. Sister isn’t asked to remove the rainbow or do anything. Thanks for the time and she’s off.
But this fucking parent okay? WHERE DO THEY GET OFF that a 2x1 inch flag on the back of a person’s hand means they get to complain that the adult in question is “sharing their political beliefs”.
What they fuck are they going to do when maintenance finally gets around to replacing the placards in our middle school with ones that don’t reference gender at all? (Because that’s a thing that is IN THE WORKS.)
Part of me wants to know who the parent is so I can stare at them in WTF every time they drive by. The other part of me doesn’t want to know because it’s not their kid’s fault they have ignorant ass parents.
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@junipersky said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
But this fucking parent okay? WHERE DO THEY GET OFF that a 2x1 inch flag on the back of a person’s hand means they get to complain that the adult in question is “sharing their political beliefs”.
It’s taken me a while to learn that what people say is less important than what they are trying to do with their speech. This parent isn’t complaining that your sister was being inappropriate, not really. The parent is complaining that your sister is an apostate who must be forced to conform to the orthodoxy of the parent’s beliefs or else fired and sent off to the wastelands where the rest of the heretics shall languish and suffer, removed from the true light.
I share your anger at this parent. My throat is tightening and it’s an effort to keep my jaw unclenched.
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I am constantly reminded why I got out of teaching.
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I would be offended by any of my coworkers being treated like this, but the fact that its my younger-by-eight-years sister makes me want to tear someone’s eyes out.
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I don’t hate kids but I often hate parents.
Also, I hate everyone/anyone who dragged this sort of thing up to use it as fuel for perpetual culture war but that’s another, nastier rant.
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My cat passed suddenly last night with no warning. She was fine, and then she wasn’t, and even though we got her into the car as quickly as we could she didn’t make it to the vet.
We’ve had her for 13 years, and I really wasn’t ready to lose her. I thought we had a good few years left with her. My only consolation is that had it been 10 minutes later we’d have been out at the shops and she’d have been alone, but as it was we were able to tell her everything was gonna be okay.
I’m in fucking pieces. I keep listening for her and being careful where I put my feet and every time it catches me out just how much it hurts. I know that this too shall pass but right now it doesn’t feel like it.
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@Rathenhope I’m so sorry. It’s the worst.
