RL Peeves

Testament

@Solstice If you’re going to fight someone in a contained area such as an apartment, smaller blades work better. So I highly approve of the Kukri, as it’s one of my favorite small blades. Because it was literally designed for decapitation. And the fact that, traditionally, soldiers who carried that knife were terrifying.

Another fun fact, most sailors or pirates on sailing vessels didn’t carry cutlasses or other swords, most generally carried hand axes, as they doubled as weapons and as tools. Much easier to fight when being boarded and in the ship’s lower decks.

Arkandel

@Solstice I have little experience burglarizing places but I think it’s fair to say if I engaged in nocturnal activities of this sort then running into a kukri-and-machette combo would make me reconsider my life’s choices in an awful hurry.

Solstice

@Testament

Please don’t tell my mother that axes exist.

Jumpscare

Do you ever just dream up an entire novel series? And then get sad that it doesn’t exist?

Even worse, I woke up just before reading the final chapter, so I have no idea how it ends. Did the main character accidentally release hell on earth during her quest to find her missing sister and escape back to earth? Was the demon actually going to return her sister? Why did the demon say that all will be revealed at an art show in the middle of nowhere? What was the significance of that one artist’s missing portfolio?

I had 20 pages to go, and now I’ll never know.

Arkandel

@Jumpscare said in RL Peeves:

I had 20 pages to go, and now I’ll never know.

Write it down! And then you just have to fill up a measly 20 pages to finish it up.

Jumpscare

@Arkandel said in RL Peeves:

@Jumpscare said in RL Peeves:

I had 20 pages to go, and now I’ll never know.

Write it down! And then you just have to fill up a measly 20 pages to finish it up.

If only! I’m not as good a writer as my subconscious. I have no idea what it was planning.

Aria

Apparently, I lack an entrepreneurial mindset.

“We invented all-new chips made from 100% fruit as a snackable alternative to high fat, heavily processed snacks and are bringing them to market in the United States next year. As an added bonus, we uncovered a way to render our waste into a grummy, fruit flavored sheet packaged as individual rolls.”

“…So you learned how to use a dehydrator and invented fruit rollups. Cool, cool.”

‘“It’s like Amazon, but for books!”
“Dude, Amazon WAS for books.”
“Yeah, but I mean like Kindle Unlimited, where you can borrow things and return them!”
“…That’s a library, bro. They already exist. And also they are free.”’.

If I have to listen to one more “entrepreneur” blather on for an entire hour about their personal journey as an “industry disrupter”, I am going to fucking cut someone.

stare

Arkandel

<mansplains how these are ACSHUALLY valid examples of industry disruption>

<@Aria smacks him on the head with a wet fish>

Ow!

GF

Garfield Eats.

Aria

@Arkandel I mean, fruit rollups are awesome. If someone has made them organic and also somehow not horrible for you, that’s cool. I’m down. But they’re not a “snack industry disruptor” and they need to calm the fuck down.

SpaceKhomeini

@GF

You too have witnessed this horror.

This guy is just openly a shameless huckster. It’s kind of refreshing to me if I look at it a certain way.

GF

@SpaceKhomeini Yeah, any time discussions of entrepreneurs come up, my brain immediately goes to Nathan Masri.

Snackness

If any of y’all are in college and your professors get after you for not reading?

Those fuckers don’t read either.

ETA: Okay I talked to the particular person I was mad at on the phone and she’s actually a really sweet old lady so I feel bad that I called her a fucker on here, but she still didn’t read.

Herja

@Snackness said in RL Peeves:

If any of y’all are in college and your professors get after you for not reading?

Those fuckers don’t read either.

Can confirm

Kestrel

Fuck Charles.

KarmaBum

Climate change.

I was all excited to RP last weekend, going to have a great time!!!

And now it’s been 20 degrees hotter than normal for a week straight, and I have lost my mojo entirely.

Evilgrayson

@Kestrel Thanks, but I’d really rather not.

TNP

Harry is the hottie.

GF

Not really a peeve, just something I’m thinking about.

Any of you Americans ever notice how often we’ll say “no” to mean “yes” and vice-versa? I’ve never had a problem telling which way someone means the word, but I’m sitting here trying to figure out the rules as if I needed to explain it to someone who’s ESL, and I can’t isolate the rules at all.

Testament

@GF There’s a variant among Midwesterners.

“Yeah, no.”

and

“No, yeah.”

It’s exactly as maddening as you imagine it to be.