RL Peeves
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In moderation. ALL THINGS IN MODERATION.
I was a teenaged geeklet when Fellowship of the Rings came out. My mother for some reason decided that she was going to be the coolest parent ever and get me replica of Aragorn’s ‘Strider’ sword. I was over the moon. I loved the hell out of it and ran around all over the back yard with it, pretending I was a cool ranger. Shut up, it’s a really cool replica.
Things escalated quickly. My mother latches onto themed gifts. Because that sword was a hit, well…
I now have Strider’s Sword, a Bowie Knife, a Kukri that my grandfather received as a gift when he was an ambassador, a survival knife with flint, a machete, a dagger…
It all sits in my closet. Whenever I move, I dread the ‘I’m carrying so many knives’ car ride and try my damnedest to obey all traffic laws. To this day I dread Christmas, as there seems to be about a solid 45% chance that my amount of cutlery will continue to grow.
I will say that the one time I thought I had a home invader, it was very reassuring to flip the lights on, roll out of bed, and break out THE MACHETE AND THE KUKRI.
… it was just the apartment settling, but damn it, I was so ready.
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@Solstice If you’re going to fight someone in a contained area such as an apartment, smaller blades work better. So I highly approve of the Kukri, as it’s one of my favorite small blades. Because it was literally designed for decapitation. And the fact that, traditionally, soldiers who carried that knife were terrifying.
Another fun fact, most sailors or pirates on sailing vessels didn’t carry cutlasses or other swords, most generally carried hand axes, as they doubled as weapons and as tools. Much easier to fight when being boarded and in the ship’s lower decks.
I don't know what I'm doing. Poke at Seven Nations sevennations.aresmush.com port 2021
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@Solstice I have little experience burglarizing places but I think it’s fair to say if I engaged in nocturnal activities of this sort then running into a kukri-and-machette combo would make me reconsider my life’s choices in an awful hurry.
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Please don’t tell my mother that axes exist.
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Do you ever just dream up an entire novel series? And then get sad that it doesn’t exist?
Even worse, I woke up just before reading the final chapter, so I have no idea how it ends. Did the main character accidentally release hell on earth during her quest to find her missing sister and escape back to earth? Was the demon actually going to return her sister? Why did the demon say that all will be revealed at an art show in the middle of nowhere? What was the significance of that one artist’s missing portfolio?
I had 20 pages to go, and now I’ll never know.
Game-runner of Silent Heaven, a small-town horror MU.
https://silentheaven.org -
@Jumpscare said in RL Peeves:
I had 20 pages to go, and now I’ll never know.
Write it down! And then you just have to fill up a measly 20 pages to finish it up.
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@Jumpscare said in RL Peeves:
I had 20 pages to go, and now I’ll never know.
Write it down! And then you just have to fill up a measly 20 pages to finish it up.
If only! I’m not as good a writer as my subconscious. I have no idea what it was planning.
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Apparently, I lack an entrepreneurial mindset.
“We invented all-new chips made from 100% fruit as a snackable alternative to high fat, heavily processed snacks and are bringing them to market in the United States next year. As an added bonus, we uncovered a way to render our waste into a grummy, fruit flavored sheet packaged as individual rolls.”
“…So you learned how to use a dehydrator and invented fruit rollups. Cool, cool.”
‘“It’s like Amazon, but for books!”
“Dude, Amazon WAS for books.”
“Yeah, but I mean like Kindle Unlimited, where you can borrow things and return them!”
“…That’s a library, bro. They already exist. And also they are free.”’.
If I have to listen to one more “entrepreneur” blather on for an entire hour about their personal journey as an “industry disrupter”, I am going to fucking cut someone.
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<mansplains how these are ACSHUALLY valid examples of industry disruption>
<@Aria smacks him on the head with a wet fish>
Ow!
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Garfield Eats.
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@Arkandel I mean, fruit rollups are awesome. If someone has made them organic and also somehow not horrible for you, that’s cool. I’m down. But they’re not a “snack industry disruptor” and they need to calm the fuck down.
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@SpaceKhomeini Yeah, any time discussions of entrepreneurs come up, my brain immediately goes to Nathan Masri.
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If any of y’all are in college and your professors get after you for not reading?
Those fuckers don’t read either.
ETA: Okay I talked to the particular person I was mad at on the phone and she’s actually a really sweet old lady so I feel bad that I called her a fucker on here, but she still didn’t read.
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@Snackness said in RL Peeves:
If any of y’all are in college and your professors get after you for not reading?
Those fuckers don’t read either.
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Fuck Charles.
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Climate change.
I was all excited to RP last weekend, going to have a great time!!!
And now it’s been 20 degrees hotter than normal for a week straight, and I have lost my mojo entirely.
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@Kestrel Thanks, but I’d really rather not.
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Harry is the hottie.
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Not really a peeve, just something I’m thinking about.
Any of you Americans ever notice how often we’ll say “no” to mean “yes” and vice-versa? I’ve never had a problem telling which way someone means the word, but I’m sitting here trying to figure out the rules as if I needed to explain it to someone who’s ESL, and I can’t isolate the rules at all.
