Bannings
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@Testament said in Bannings:
And it took them a long good while, but @Aria did play a large role in shaking me free of that particular mindset. So they’re absolutely right, there is more good than bad. I just have to be reminded of it.
I am terrible at human emotions. Vulnerability is gross and also possibly contagious and that is profoundly concerning because feelings are those unfortunate things that happen to other people.
I am, however, happy to yell at people to stop being miserable and sad. Or physically force them into something productive as a distraction. You would be surprised how often this actually works.
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@Aria If you’re comfortable sharing in public, what are your pronouns so I can make sure I’m using the right ones?
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I prefer they/them. She/her is also fine. Like, I won’t be mad about it or offended if someone uses that, especially given how complicated my own feelings about gender are and the fact that my body-type adds a lived experience I will always have thrust on me barring major surgery I don’t want, but I do get the warm fuzzies when folks at least try.
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@Aria Thank you for sharing! I think a lot of us are more than willing to try
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Even if I want to yell at someone about how they’re being a total shitty asshole, I want to yell at them with the right pronouns.
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Even if I want to yell at someone about how they’re being a total shitty asshole, I want to yell at them with the right pronouns.
I laughed way harder at this than I should have.
See, everyone? @Roz has it.
“They’re being a totally shitty asshole.”
“I want to yell at them.”
“Ugh, Aria. They’re the fucking wooooorst.” -
There isn’t some sort of nodebb plugin that’d let people add pronouns somewhere handy, is there? Maybe to the little hover tooltip over avatars, or at least an entry in the profile form? Could be nice.
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There isn’t some sort of nodebb plugin that’d let people add pronouns somewhere handy, is there? Maybe to the little hover tooltip over avatars, or at least an entry in the profile form? Could be nice.
You can put it in your signature. (Because no, there isn’t any that I can find. There were a few, and they haven’t been updated in eons.)
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@Pavel Gotta add to mine, and everyone should also maybe link to the top of their ‘where to find me/join in my crimes against MUSHdom’ thread, if they have one.
Or don’t I’m not your mom. At least, not yet.
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@GF Yes. That’s pretty much it. Though being plus-sized, which also comes with BREASTS*, I’m also keenly aware that I will never quite be able to figure out if I’m not entirely comfortable identifying as female because I’m not female or because I’m just bad at performing it “properly”.
Regardless of the changes I make to my appearance, people will continue to perceive me as distinctly female, just either with the additional labels of “butch”, “dyke”, “unprofessional”, “lazy”, or “physically ill today”, all of which I’ve received at varying times when having short hair, wearing men’s clothes, or not wearing makeup.
I don’t know the answer to my own question, and won’t ever be able to find out, because I’m also not the right size or shape to do “ambiguously queer” properly, either.
*Watch the video. It’s hilarious.
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@Pavel It’s an SNL sketch called “Lingerie Store” and is a wildly accurate and wildly entertaining portrayal of what trying to buy a bra is like when you practically need industrial equipment to carry 'em around.
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As the old ‘Those who are not welcome were those engaging in personal attacks’ line has been trotted out again, let’s actually look at what happened.
So. The bannings started after Gany’s post of 7:31pm on the 5th of May.
The first people to post was Karmabum stating they were not breaking any rules, and Gany should go back to pretending this isn’t happening. Result? Ban
Second is Snackness saying Karmabum was accurate and that she isn’t sorry for posting, as she isn’t in secondary school. Result? Ban
Tsar says it is obvious Gany doesn’t want convo, so why not lock the thread rather than ban people, critiqued Gany’s tone and suggested she step. away. Result? Ban
Arkandel posts mild criticism of Derp’s ability to admit he is wrong, and asked for clarification on points. Result? Not banned.
Meg posts that people didn’t deserve this, and begs Gany to unban and lock thread. Result? Ban. Later reversed.
Third-Eyed Crow suggests Anglo Saxon fornication to Gany. Result? Banned (Note: The first real “personal attack”)
Narson, the evil dipshit, states they are confused on why Arkandel isn’t banned for the fourth post after no talking. Result? Banned.
Sahin asks ‘Why?’ and posts a cat GIF. Result? Warning to ‘Don’t. Just Don’t’.
Arkandel posts asking what did he do in response to Narson. Result? Gany offers to PM with him.
Gany posts to Sahin and Arkandel.
Ifrit posts critiques Gany’s ‘Emotionless Cat Lawyer Boy’ persona, and suggests she has destroyed 10 years of community by not just stepping back, he then says goodbye. Result? Banned
Bear_Necessities repeats Third-Eyed Crow’s offer. Result? Nothing at this point (Note: Arguably the second real “Personal attack”)
Flyrannosaurus posts a gif of an M60 firing out of a helicopter. Resault? Nothing
Bear states they weren’t silenced and for Gany to stop and reverse bans. Result? Banned
Sahin says they won’t stop and asks for ban. Result? Banned.
DeletedUser posts gif of mass slapping. Result? Nothing
Herja points out the hypocrisy in this action compared to Derp situation, and states Gany looks like a clown. Result? Ban
Prism states that they’d rather be banned than hang around with who is left. Result? Banned
Scar states Gany is unhinged. Result? Banned but then reversed.
Coin states ‘message received’. Result? Banned but reversed without comment and removed from even original banned list.
Groth asks if this is how it ends. Result? Nothing
Hellfrog posts a GIF asking what in tarnation. Result? Nothing
Selira says Gany has killed the board. Result? Nothing
Ghost posts a question mark, then says the baord is getting better from bannings in a second post. After a while he posts two more times, after another Gany ask to stop posting. Result? Finally banned. Then reversed.
3543thrh67 posts that Gany is surprised. Result? Nothing
Cobalt posts asking Gany to take a cool off. Result? Gany states she won’t ban Cobalt for it.
ILuvGrumpyCat posts pointing out Ghost’s problematic history, and also addresses their disappointment in Gany’s choices. States she can go ahead and ban them. Result? Banned
OldFrightful says just lock the thread. Result? Nothing
Roz posts that Gany has degraded her authority, and cross links to the Macha/Farfalla logs. Result? Banned
Now. When it comes to personal attacks, the more clear are Scar, Third-Eyed and Bear-Necessities. Of those, Scar’s ban is reversed and Bear has to post a second time in order to get banned. The challenge to authority, the questioning of it, rather than the personal attack is what gets the ban. And I’d argue that is the more obvious common denominator there. And in terms of whether bans got reversed, several of those who were banned (Like Coin), Gany stated her own feelings that these were the hard ones. So friendship matters more in not being excluded (kinda…well…what’s the term? Clique behaviour?).
So no, those that are unwelcome on MSB aren’t those who engaged in personal attacks. It is those that asked questions of an admin who admits their behaviour could be reasonably described as unhinged (hence the reversal of Scar’s ban for the unhinged personal attack). Several of those who did engage in personal attacks or expressed glee at the bannings etc didn’t even get a warning. Again, suggesting that standards were relaxed for those supporting the admin position even if their behaviour mirrored or was worse than those being banned.
When someone shows you who they are, over and over again? Believe them.
