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MU Peeves Thread
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foksthery said in MU Peeves Thread:
@bear_necessities your friend is a fucking gaslighter who was really weird to me elseMU to the point where being on the same game as them made me super anxious and I was doing my best to respect their boundaries and drove myself batty. I should have left on my own. That was on me. You were right to boot me. No quarrel there.
I’ve removed the ‘at’ for foksthery because she’s said she’s not reading the forum anymore, and it doesn’t seem fair to ping her.
However, by context, it’s pretty clear that she’s referring to me, here. Because the previous incident of me being “really weird” and “gaslighting” her is on MSB, I’m going to summarize it here, in case those things go away from MSB at some point. You can find the details - including quotes of logs - on MSB if you care to.
The previous game was The Network. I was playing a character with wings, her character indicated that she was going to take his feathers without permission to put in her pillows. I OOCly mentioned that I found that a bit creepy, she said she didn’t care, her character was doing it, and I just decided not to argue about it. Later, a couple of people were making jokes about stealing my character’s feathers, and I asked people to stop - I freely admit it’s a stupid thing to get weirded out about, but it just hit me wrong and I didn’t want it to be a running joke. She said something about not realizing it upset me, I pointed out that I’d mentioned that in the scene.
She paged me with this big, anxious apology, and followed up with something like, by the way, don’t ever call my character ‘exotic’ again. Then vagueposted on MSB about it. Problem was, I’d never done that - and it being an Ares game, I had the logs to prove it. She tried to backpedal about how it wasn’t about me, so I pointed out that there’s no logs backing up the idea that anyone had done so. At which point she broke down, apologized (almost exactly like her apology earlier in this thread) and I figured it was over.
Later game, Santa Rosalia, I realized she was on the game. I had advertised for a play group I was putting together, and she signed up. I reached out to her, let her know who I was (I don’t have an Ares handle), and that I really prefer not to run anything for her or play with her. She was very understanding, and we avoided each other from then on. I gave a head’s up to staff so that they wouldn’t put us in any GMed scenes together if it could be avoided. I genuinely thought that was the end of it, and didn’t much think about her after that.
So, that’s the story, as far as I know and understand it. Whether I’m manipulative or a gaslighter, I guess I leave to everyone else to decide.
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@Pyrephox And that is why I laughed in her face.
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@Pyrephox said in MU Peeves Thread:
So, that’s the story, as far as I know and understand it. Whether I’m manipulative or a gaslighter, I guess I leave to everyone else to decide.
I have decided.
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@Pyrephox said in MU Peeves Thread:
I guess I leave to everyone else to decide.
The clique will meet shortly to decide your fate.
He/Him. Opinions and views are solely my own unless specifically stated otherwise.
BE AN ADULT -
@Pavel said in MU Peeves Thread:
@Pyrephox said in MU Peeves Thread:
I guess I leave to everyone else to decide.
The clique will meet shortly to decide your fate.
If I am to be executed, I request that it be done properly. Rifles at dawn.
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Why is it never cannons, or mortar shell??? If I had to go out that way, I’d want it to be metal as hell and get O B L I T E R A T E D
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@Wizz said in MU Peeves Thread:
Why is it never cannons, or mortar shell??? If I had to go out that way, I’d want it to be metal as hell and get O B L I T E R A T E D
…okay, fair point. Getting blown away by a cannon at close range would be a very metal way of going out.
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@Pavel said in MU Peeves Thread:
@Pyrephox said in MU Peeves Thread:
I guess I leave to everyone else to decide.
The clique will meet shortly to decide your fate.
after some deliberation, @Pyrephox … shantay, you stay.
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@Wizz said in MU Peeves Thread:
Why is it never cannons, or mortar shell??? If I had to go out that way, I’d want it to be metal as hell and get O B L I T E R A T E D
That is an execution method in North Korea, I believe.
ETA: Additionally, “blowing from a gun” is… well worth a read.
He/Him. Opinions and views are solely my own unless specifically stated otherwise.
BE AN ADULT -
Oof. “Often resulting in death” is never what you want to hear.
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@Wizz I dunno, I’ve had a cannon or two blow my back out without resulting in death…
He/Him. Opinions and views are solely my own unless specifically stated otherwise.
BE AN ADULT -
@Pavel pls, i was drinking coffee when i read this.
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@Testament said in MU Peeves Thread:
All I know is that I’ve done shit and it took me multiple lessons to figure my shit out. I’ve been there. I get it. Not everyone learns the first time and to imply otherwise is a lie.
It’s not my job to be someone else’s learning experience and I don’t have to accept it or forgive it.
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@farfalla I’m talking for me in that statement, based on my own past history, not other people. If I cannot be empathetic to that, when I know that I have behaved in similar vein the past, then that makes me an asshole and a hypocrite.
Anyone else’s experiences are valid to them, along with their reactions to it. This is simply my experience and the lessons I’ve taken from it.
I don't know what I'm doing. Poke at Seven Nations sevennations.aresmush.com port 2021
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You’re not a terrible person for being friends with her and giving her another chance, and I don’t think anyone thinks you are!
I think other people might be concerned that you’re judging them for not, which is why the edge-of-defensive reactions. I know you’re not actually meaning to be interpreted that way, though. These are tricky situations to navigate through for everybody.
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@IoleRae I’m not, no. That’s not my intent, and if thats hiw it comes off then i apologize. I think my main goal is doing for someone what was not done for me. Which is trying to help someone who at least seems to be aware of their issues are caused by their own actions. Self awareness is needed. Maybe I’ll get burned for that. Maybe I won’t, not up to me.
All I know is that i had to figure out my own mistakes on my own and that was a long road to betterment. I just don’t want another person that I consider a friend having to go through that by themselves. Because I know they’re not a bad person, just make bad decisions.
I don't know what I'm doing. Poke at Seven Nations sevennations.aresmush.com port 2021
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@Testament As long as you knowing they’re not a bad person is also a personal opinion, then there’s nothing wrong with forgiving or giving second chances. But the people who don’t agree with you aren’t wrong, either.
The Culture of Forgiveness is strong and, imo, hugely destructive. Forgiveness is morally neutral and I will die on this hill.
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@farfalla I mean, our perspective on who’s a decent person and who isn’t is usually built by personal experiences, all of which is valid for that person. I know not everyone is going to universally agree, and thats perfectly okay. There’s still people on this site who haven’t set aside things I’ve done. And that’s fine, that’s their cross to bear at this point.
But suppose I also equate a lot of mush drama with the same scrutiny of Twitter beefs. That is to say, not nearly as relevant(yes, I know, this isn’t always the case).
So yes, forgiveness can be destructive, i agree. But I also believe it depends on the situation. The history, the evidence of changing behavior, the ability to improve, make amends, ect ect.
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@Wizz Apparently “tied to the muzzle of a double-shotted cannon and blown to bits” was a thing in the late 1700s and early 1800s.
ETA: …and Pavel got there before me.
