Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent
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@Meg I’m so so so sorry. If you need to talk I’m here for you. You have always been awesome in my book when we have run into each other!
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Greetings!
I’m going to post this and I’m already feeling awkward about it and let me say I mean it in a positive way. I hope the perception is also the intention.
I play one game, but I’ve played with a lot of you over the past year. On MSB, I posted that the ADHD struggles (and some here that spawned this), I was going through. I’m on a great path with a great doctor and the last few months have been where I’ve ‘regulated’ more.
So what am I typing about? I’m sorry. I just want to say that I didn’t realize a lot of times how badly I was misjudging my phrasing, my humor, my intensity, and my reactions to things. I didn’t realize how my emotions were deregulated, etc.
If you were involved in any of these (as players, staff, etc) you know what I mean. The last month (and hopefully forwards) I’ve felt a huge change in how my brain is processing. I am not excusing anything I said or did (and really I don’t think they were like EVIL bad), but I legit did not know. This has always been my brain and I didn’t realize not everyone’s functioned this way until this year and the last few months.
So I am very sorry to any that I crossed lines with, made inappropriate jokes OOC, or anything else.
Thanks for reading!
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@RightMeow said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
but I’ve played with a lot of you over the past year
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Well I mean…
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@RightMeow In seriousness, I applaud your strength to acknowledge past missteps and your ability to take responsibility for them rather than taking the easy path and blaming the disorder. Well done.
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@RightMeow Honestly, I relate hard to this. Now if I could just remember to take my meds every day I bet I would relate to it even more.
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LOL - the irony of this is – I forgot to take my meds today.
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@RightMeow there was a meme going around the book of faces about how ADHD people lack the ability to form habits when we aren’t taking our meds so then we don’t take our habit-forming medication to form the habit of taking our meds and I was like
I’m in this picture and I don’t like it
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@RightMeow as someone who once had to be pulled aside by staff on a game about how my internet ‘tone’ was coming off, and I’m not even ADHD, I sympathize so much with this. I don’t think we played together, but hopefully those that played with you and might have felt any offense will see this!
Also, I’m glad you are getting help!
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Thank you. I figure that just because I didn’t know, doesn’t mean I didn’t do it. I can’t undo it either, so it’s just moving forwards. My hope is anyone that I left a sour taste in their mouth, they realize it was all me (and my brain) and I really, really, really did not mean it personal and I did not mean to offend.
When I do mean to offend, I own that too.
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@RightMeow YAY! Glad to hear you are doing better!
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I’m about to get tested for ADHD. If it turns out I have it, I will hunt you down, @RightMeow, for advice. I am so clueless.
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@L-B-Heuschkel Don’t worry. So are most medical professionals.
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@L-B-Heuschkel said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
I’m about to get tested for ADHD. If it turns out I have it, I will hunt you down, @RightMeow, for advice. I am so clueless.
I (and my psych provider) swear by How to ADHD on youtube. Very digestible, helpful, and relatable.
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@hellfrog Could you post a link? That title seems vague enough to feature many options.
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Absolutely!
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@hellfrog Thank you. I’ll definitely take a look at it. It’d be ironic to get diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 51, after all these years of being called lazy, stupid, and unfocused.
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@L-B-Heuschkel said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
@hellfrog Thank you. I’ll definitely take a look at it. It’d be ironic to get diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 51, after all these years of being called lazy, stupid, and unfocused.
I got diagnosed at 39 and IDK you but just from that sentence alone, I say: welcome.
Just knowing was a big help on its own, to start unlearning all that internalized criticism. It’s a process.
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@hellfrog Yeah. I’m kind of hoping because it’s been a long time since gave up on even going to college and frankly, I’m tired of it. I’m no dumber than the next person, I just have chronic fatigue and struggle to focus for long.
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@hellfrog said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
@L-B-Heuschkel said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
@hellfrog Thank you. I’ll definitely take a look at it. It’d be ironic to get diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 51, after all these years of being called lazy, stupid, and unfocused.
I got diagnosed at 39 and IDK you but just from that sentence alone, I say: welcome.
Just knowing was a big help on its own, to start unlearning all that internalized criticism. It’s a process.
I just got diagnosed this year and I’m not young. So I feel this deeply. Someone posted this how to ADHD and you HAVE to watch it. It was like hearing my life that I couldn’t explain. It’s why I went and got diagnosed. Which was this year. You got this. We got you.