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MU Peeves Thread
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I try not to ask for RP unless I have at least one idea to put on the table.
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Look, I don’t want to make you do all the work, but sometimes, just putting myself out there to ask for rp at all has been the hard part.
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I never have problems coming up with scenarios, I think folks that rp with me will confirm that, but on games I have alts on its not unheard of me to offer either alt based on player pref since I don’t know which one of theirs they might be wanting to either rp because its easier or they are trying to get more time on them and don’t have as much opportunity or that some people’s pcs just are more limited than mine so they’d prefer one over the other.
As someone who is rarely proactively asked to RP and has to do a lot of the asking/arranging if I want to RP it sucks to worry that people are going to judge me for that or they won’t give me a chance because I offered to be flexible but otoh I don’t really have a choice but to brush it off and keep asking if I want to be able to RP.
As an asker there are plenty of people who accept and then don’t know what they want too. Oh anything is good/no not that my pc wouldn’t go there. Its a fine line to dance as an asker because I’m sure those folks get judgy if you don’t come up with the right guess too. When two players agree to rp im not sure I think either one owes the other a greater set up responsibility esp if there wasn’t a specific scene invite. It’s good to touch base to make sure its something that works for both which can be hard for randos so you may have to ask would you prefer the vampire alt or the werelobster?
If I have a strong pref for something specific I solicit that on chan (I’m going to set a scene in X, would anyone like to join me?) But absent that i like to see who I get, look at any aspirations and then might ask them if they have any prefs. I dont think everyone does that but I don’t see it being really abnormal either.
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@mietze said in MU Peeves Thread:
so you may have to ask would you prefer the vampire alt or the werelobster?
Werelobster for me every time.
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@mietze said in MU Peeves Thread:
Oh anything is good/no not that my pc wouldn’t go there.
Oh, mercy, this one. Angels and ministers of grace defend us, it’s like trying to take C.S. Lewis’ mother-in-law out to lunch. She doesn’t want to be any trouble, so she won’t pick a place, but every place you pick will not do, and you need to activate the orbital mind control lasers to get her to express an opinion besides that your suggestion is wrong. Or worse, she agrees and then, when the waitstaff have already wasted their time on you, admits thats she couldn’t possibly order anything in this place. (Ahh, hooray, they finally agreed to meet my PC at the park! Oh no, now they refuse to pose interactively, and are describing their character having hay-fever and apologizing OOC for how they feel awkward and just don’t know what to do in this scene! @whee!)
Still, I am really a lot cooler with this sort of thing than with that exasperating player whose MO is to chan “I am ready to RP now!” but who also responds to people who say, “Anyone want to scene?” by telling them how unappealing such vague offers are, and that they really have to write a 10 page module-adventure and show everybody the Larry Elmore cover and the blurb on the back or of course nobody’s gonna want to come out.
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@mietze said in MU Peeves Thread:
It’s good to touch base to make sure its something that works for both which can be hard for randos so you may have to ask would you prefer the vampire alt or the werelobster?
When I’m of this mind, I like to go, “Want to go line-dancing or something with my vampire alt or get into a brawl with werecrabs with my werelobster alt? Or any ideas you might have for either.”
Because then I’m not setting off the instinctive “Ugh, they don’t know what they want besides me to entertain them” reaction that I totally get and often have, but I’m also offering some flexibility.
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On the one (bigger) hand, I am glad I finally have a steady job. On the other, I miss having more free time!
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I don’t mind the dance of setting up RP, because in the same way I like to tailor my suggestions for location and event to the person who’s responding, mostly because I prefer smaller scenes to setting up an open thing in a location. The thing that does bother me is when people respond to an ask for rp in a way that doesn’t make clear whether they’re actually volunteering for RP in the moment or not. I have mixed feelings about a response that’s “I’m busy now but maybe some other day,” but it’s at least a clear response.
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@Smile said in MU Peeves Thread:
On the one (bigger) hand, I am glad I finally have a steady job. On the other, I miss having more free time!
Corollary: I’m glad I went back to school, but I miss having mental energy to do MU* things. I almost literally can’t focus on traditional* scene pacing anymore. These days I just feel like a cat where I need to be curled up for a nap half the day.
(* as defined by the Ares system)
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When one of my characters theme songs come on my Tidal… and then I go awww 🥰 but then when I remember I can’t play her anymore and I go awwww
. Too soon. -
There’s always more nuance than can be expressed in a peeve thread, but I think there’s quite a big difference between someone asking for RP and being willing to hash out a quick and dirty “what are we rping about” where both people are offering up some ideas (and which alt coming might be in the discussion), or even someone saying, “Hey, I would love some RP with you but I really don’t have have any ideas today, does anything come to your mind,” or asking me if I mind setting, and someone who asks for RP and then puts the onus of choosing every single thing about a scene on the other person. The former two are great, and I never mind setting a scene. The latter can quickly become frustrating.
Asking for RP can be really difficult. I also get brain blocks and feel anxiety about putting myself out there into the void. I’ve been on games where I’ve never once gotten a response when I’ve requested on the RP request channel, which of course isn’t unique to me, but it’s always tough and never feels great. But it’s also tough to be asked for RP and then have to come up with everything myself including who the other person is bringing, especially if it’s happening a lot.
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I have SUCH respect for players I know who seem great at scenario generation, which is something I tend to be terrible at. Whenever I end up playing with someone who put in the energy and effort to do that for a scene with me, I try extra hard to bring my biggest YES, AND energy to it. (Also because when you have a cool setting/scenario to jump into, it’s already energizing!)
If I can’t be the ideas person, I try to at least be the one who will run with the ideas.
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When you put a lot of effort into the game you are running with some others, but all of the credit goes to one person. You could speak up, you could let people know how much you do, but the person who is getting the credit is amazing, so you just don’t say anything at all.
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When asking for RP. I (like others) go through a lot of mental taxation without always getting RP representation.
Me: I’d like to play.
Me: I should ask for play.
Me: What if I get silence back?
Me: Does that mean everyone hates me? They might. Maybe I don’t have RP right now because my RP sucks. Should I ask? Would that be invasive to their RL and free time? Does it look like I’m bothering anyone if I ask on channel? Okay, you can do this. Come on. You are fine. Let’s do this. You can do this. Is their char currently involved in anything? Should I ask? Will it mess with their story? What if I get too many people and then I have to bail? Um… no no, it’s okay you can do this.Me: Hey, would you like to RP?
Them: Sure, what do you want to RP?
Me: …
Me: Fuck.So in very long conclusion, it’s not that I want the other person to do the work. It’s more I don’t know what story they like or what they are interested in. If it’s someone I know, then I’m different. Then I’m like let’s RP this. New people though, I’m like wuhoh. Do I only have one shot to make a suggestion and I lose RP partners for life?
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@RightMeow if i’m not sure what to do/where to go regardless of if i’m the asker or askee, often times i just admit that. it doesn’t happen often for me as i’m good at brainstorming, but sometimes i do ask people if there’s anything they would want in particular just because, well, if i don’t know them or they don’t have asps or prefs or anything set i mean i can fling a lot of ideas out there but having someone say no i don’t like that again and again is kind of a bummer too so it never hurts to ask.
but i think it’s also okay to say “this is a little awkward but i hadn’t gotten to that stage yet because i was fretting about asking, so let me think about that for a minute, is there anything that YOU don’t want other than the no-brainers?”
i think anyone that is so hung up on people asking them in exactly the right way the first time upon meeting that they will never scene with you ever again probably isn’t a loss for you. in fact, steering clear of folks like that might be the recipe for happiness on the game so you don’t have to play walk on eggshells. most people aren’t like that. maybe they’ll have a brief moment of annoyance, or laughter because accepting used up all their momentary energy so they need to think too, but they’ll get over it. if they cannot then it would have been only a matter of time before you got yourself disinvited from sceneing with their august person anyway.
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My usual strategy at that point is to look at whatever info is available on their character, brainstorm 2-3 locations our characters could conceivably overlap, and offer all of them as suggestions.
Then once we’ve picked a spot and the scene starts, it’s just a matter of picking something that brings the characters into contact ASAP. Either that’s posting a starter the other person can directly respond to, or responding to their starter in a way that gives them something to work on. A scene can still be shaped a couple poses in - you’ve almost always got more time to figure out what you’re doing than the 30 seconds before you have to answer that question in your scenario. You’ve just got to break it down into smaller steps.
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you know, it’s hard to want to play somewhere when all it seems to attract are actors that want to play damaging stereotypes (keep playing up the Slavic accent for yuks, I see you.) and use wildly outdated and offensive language in their (as yet unapproved – but, seriously) descriptions.
they | them
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The urge to disappear forever when the Interesting Conflict Dynamic was not actually that. As ever, I am my own biggest peeve.
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@ten Whale ah dooo deeclayuh!
