Bannings
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@Arkandel The ‘someone explain’ wasn’t meant to be directed at you to explain, and yeah, we all know why.
I just think it would be funny if you, specifically, pointed out the hypocrisy of it. Or maybe not, I dunno, it’s hot at work and I’m annoyed at how easy it is that I’m getting worked up over all this shit again.
Also, the catharsis of getting one of them to state it plainly would be amazing.
Mummy Pun? MUMMY PUN!
She/her -
That’s really not a fair request to make of him, he’s stated he doesn’t want to pick a side.
the entity previously known as Sunny
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Now the community seems fractured. Hopefully it is a problem that will fix itself.
I do think it’ll sort itself out in time. We’ve all been through lots of cycles on these many MU boards and for better or worse this doesn’t feel too different to me than the way the other ones came to be over the years. Not that it doesn’t bum me out, it’s a very niche hobby and having users scattered sucks just in terms of ease of use if nothing else, and the I feel for folks who’ve had actual strained or damaged personal relationships. It has been cool to see old names pop up here, though, you among them.
I’m not personally looking for any rhyme or reason to the bannings that went down in that thread, I doubt I’d find any answers I got non-aggravating anyway even if the MSB mods want to give them someday, so. So it goes.
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shine lamp on @Arkandel like old school detective show
And why weren’t YOU banned, hmmmmmm?
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That’s really not a fair request to make of him, he’s stated he doesn’t want to pick a side.
This is fair, and I should clarify: I am not asking @Arkandel to actually do it.
But I am definitely implying that I would do a little chaos goblin laugh and/or dance if he chose to do it on his own.
Mummy Pun? MUMMY PUN!
She/her -
I was going to say something along the lines of… it might be worth something for @Arkandel to use whatever leverage they seem to have (they obviously want you around!) to ask those questions but like… that’d be fruitless.
My own ban was lifted because my comment calling Gany unhinged was deemed reasonable under the circumstances. Which in itself seems like a pretty glaring admission. There’s not much logic to follow there anymore besides the trail of people being highly emotional and reactive, and with good reason given how everything played out irl.
The rationalizations to keep the bans in place came after the fact and from someone else entirely. With a pretty clear agenda.
I think it already has sorted itself out? That’s just not our home, anymore. And just so I don’t end this response on such a sad note: I really like our new home, and I really like our new stepmoms.
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That’s really not a fair request to make of him, he’s stated he doesn’t want to pick a side.
Just to explain that part though - which I think is fair.
I went to Ganymede, who’s been a friend of mine for many years, and someone whom I had (and still have) great respect for, to ask for a favor. I needed someone to take over MSB for me since I no longer played played on MU*. Gany accepted, which was great since otherwise I’d be screwed - I didn’t have a Plan B.
Now, what kind of absolute fucking asshole would I be if, a couple of months later and during the first time Gany got into hot waters, I got myself involved? Right after I ‘quit’ at that?
It’s not about MSB or MMU… BRMUD… BR… whatever the hell this forum’s acronym is. I don’t care.
But if I have a few friends left in the hobby it’s probably because I don’t go around stabbing them in the back.
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I think it’s pretty obvious that no amount whacking that hornet’s nest with a stick will lead to any kind of satisfaction. There is no catharsis to be had. There are only a lot of hornets.
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Now, what kind of absolute fucking asshole would I be if, a couple of months later and during the first time Gany got into hot waters, I got myself involved? Right after I ‘quit’ at that?
But more seriously, detective hats aside.
No one needs to go there and keep up the fight, there’s really no fight left there. And I definitely don’t think @Arkandel should.
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Not every battle is a hill worth dying on. Sometimes, a stalemate is as good as you’re going to get.
And frankly, I think that what was borne out of necessity has become better than what it came from.
That’s a good thing, I think.
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I forgot this thread was here.
I stand by my “let Derp’s forum lie” mentality, but also…Derp has been completely honest about why certain bans were lifted and others weren’t: He doesn’t like us.
Which is completely fair. I don’t like him, either.
When he was made admin, I had every intention of just bouncing. But I realize now that I fucking care about this community, and he doesn’t, so I’m glad I came back.I don’t expect to ever be unbanned there. Derp can’t handle people speaking truth to him, especially women.
The community that was WORA - that Arkandel handed over to Ganymede - isn’t fractured. It’s right fucking here.
WORA has never been an immutable line in the sand. It’s always a party that’s popped up at someone’s house 'cause their parents were out of town.
When Nymeria threatened copyright infringement and we had to flee off Proboards (or whatever that was), the community moved to a new location. This is the same thing: Ganymede torched our old neighborhood and gave the keys to Derp, so we just moved on.
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Just going to say, as the one who got banned for asking why @Arkandel didn’t get banned when the beam of light that is @Snackness did, I absolutely don’t think any of that is on Arkandel and people shouldn’t even jokingly put him in the middle. As Ark says, we all know why, and as Karma says, we know why some bans weren’t lifted.
In the choice between my friendship with @Roz and @Tez (and the occasional arguments we have) or being able to post on a place that no longer has anyone I really care about on it, I know where I am and while it hurts to be excluded and lied about, I’m quite content and people don’t need to fret.
I mean, I’ve put hard work into getting Tez to understand Narsonese, so when I go ‘Not Alfred…damn it. Isaacs. Moon fellow. Jason!’ they know who I mean.
When someone shows you who they are, over and over again? Believe them.
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My sleep schedule has been so flipped around the past half year that it’s like I work night shift without actually working night shift, so it was a trip to wake up one afternoon to a Discord DM mentioning that MSB had imploded. I wasn’t following the politics thread and had completely missed Derp being made admin, so it came as one hell of a surprise.
I was going to leave from the start, I’m fairly sure, but I did make an attempt at explaining what had gone wrong from my perspective, and that I didn’t think it likely the damage could be repaired (but if it could, it was going to take some serious effort at regaining trust). At the same time, seeing posts both in the thread I was posting in and elsewhere on the board that were basically saying different versions of ‘gtfo if you don’t like it’, was what convinced me to log out and never log back in again. I might have been one of those folks straddling both forums, but it was pretty clear people like me weren’t wanted then and it’s even more clear now. That’s okay. I’m irritated at other folks getting smeared and insulted, and increasingly incredulous at the modding decisions, but I’m not particularly upset about leaving MSB for BMD. Particularly since I can see the next explosion just sitting there waiting for another spark. They can spin themselves whatever fiction they like, but the community there isn’t going to improve if the folks with the loudest voices aren’t willing to change.
If the posts that Selira, Meg, and Solstice were making are what counts as bullying and shit stirring now, to the point people are sending DMs to the mods about how unsafe they feel because some folks are being critical, then…I don’t even know? People are going to feel what they feel, but it’s baffling to me. And one of the admin posting a DM like that, even with permission, boggles the mind, because the only possible reason for it was to go “look how upset you’re making people by disagreeing with us in a largely reasonable if occasionally snarky way”, and that after asking for honest feedback (immediately and condescendingly dismissed). So. Yeah. That’s not the kind of environment that promotes positivity and trust, it’s the kind of environment that’s going to melt down as soon as some of the regulars get into a spat with each other.
In any case, I agree that a thread like this is probably pretty healthy and cathartic for a lot of folks, though I do think that if it stops being that for someone (if you’re just getting frustrated and upset, but airing your feelings here isn’t helping), they should know that it’s okay to just step out. It’s easy to get caught up in things and not feel as though you can, there’s an injustice that needs to be righted, etc, but you need to take care of you. Vent, but don’t let yourself boil. You deserve better.
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@Narson I am not a beam of light how dare
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@Snackness I agree that was a really fucked up thing for Narson to say
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@Snackness I agree that was a really fucked up thing for Narson to say
How dare he talk about my wife like that!!!
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Right. You are a RAINBOW.
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the bullying by @Narson is out of control!!!
I’m happy to see both boards openly saying, hey, people, you can be in both boards, and I’m happy to see a lot more people coming over here. I hope people end up in a spot where they feel comfortable, and I do actually feel like there’s more … finality to things right now.
I think, overall, I’m pretty okay with that outcome from yesterday.
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I totally get people talking this out because I have no doubt it helps to be heard. Maybe especially when feeling gaslit and manipulated.
For me, and like I think I wrote in my post when I left there, the people who were banned or leaving were the people I thought were the better of the whole blow up. That made leaving easy for me because really, that place doesn’t have the people I enjoy reading and interacting with anymore.
Also, I cling to this thing I learned in therapy when I went through some shit: trust that they suck. I know I have often tried to make people see reason IRL, or believe if I point out the FACTS, that they will eventually go OH! But it rarely happens. I’m not always great at this, either, but I try. There’s nothing in it for certain people to own their shit, so they won’t. So I just trust that some of them suck, which is nothing I can do about, and go where I feel people don’t. I am SUPER glad BMD exists and am grateful to y’all for making it happen
